Friday, January 09, 2009

DEAR GOVERNMENT A**HOLES

I don't think you understand how DULL my job is. Do you realize what it takes to do my job? Basically a robot could do my job with equal skill. Occasionally do I get to use the degree for which I attended 4 years of college to obtain. And that usage? Consists of debating over the placement of a comma. Fuck it, I'll put in a million commas if I want. I LIKE THEM. The rest of my time is spent in the completion of menial jobs. The likes of which compare only to the hours I put in stuffing envelopes in a cubicle as a volunteer for my mother's stupid friend's non-profit.
I staple. I fold. I cut on the dotted line. And while I am performing these skills that we recently bought a machine to do ( seriously, we have a machine that folds paper. I could have cried with joy the day we plugged it in.) I LIKE TO WATCH MOVIES and dream of a better life. I like to chat with my friends and remind myself that it is temporary. That one day this job will end and I will be happy when it does. Secretly I hope the president will shut you down, prefering to make love, not bombs. Michelle is pretty damn good looking. And you are not. You are dull and gray and you have taken away 90% of what makes this job tolerable for me. My ability to watch a movie or tv show and talk to people that I love. If I could, I would quit you right now out of principal. But I can't. I'm stuck here because where else will I find a job that is so dull that I look forward to school starting so I have homework to do? And one that pays for me to go to said school. I'm stuck here for the next 7 months at least. BUT THEN I WILL BE GONE. And I will watch all the movies I like.

3 comments:

Peas said...

I need to get you that poster with the cute kitten hangin from it's paws on a tree branch saying "hang in there". So cheesy and horrific, how can you not love it?

Peas said...

I just realized I wrote it's instead on its. And hangin instead of hanging. Ew.

meredyth said...

haha, as an editor and English major I will mock you for incorrect usage. JK. I need that poster. But I found out how to get around the gchat thing. I'll still be on there. just not watching movies. :(